LOVE#6♡:THINGS I'VE LEARNT IN 2021.

If you've read my previous post you have a glimpse on what's been going on in my life for the past few months.

So,in relation to that post,I decided to write things that 2021 has taught me so far.

1.♡:The devil is a liar and he works overtime.

Last year during quarantine,I got closer to God more than I ever have and got to experience things I never thought I ever would.

I prayed everyday,I read my bible everyday,I bible journaled every other day.In short,I was doing all I could to maintain my relationship with God and grow as a christian.

However,what I had forgotten is that when the devil sees you getting closer to God he feels threatened so he targets you and tries everything he can to put you down.

I had already been experiencing issues with my mental health over the past few years but as 2020 went by,I started to grow worse and worse.

My anxiety became worse,I became more and more depressed everyday and my will to live was rapidly decreasing.

By the time I was going back to school in October 2020,I was a literal mess.

I started feeding onto the devil's lies that I wasn't worthy,that I was bad christian because I had anxiety and that christians were supposed to have faith that never wavers.

All this combined with all the stress that came with schoolwork made me resort to unhealthy coping mechanisms and drove me to self -destructive behaviour.

When all of this was happening I felt so far away from God.I didn't see the point of living anymore.In my view,I had failed spiritually and disappointed God,I had failed my family who were counting on me to work hard and pass my exams and I had also failed myself.

 

All of these were the devil's lies which I gladly bought and fed myself with and they completely crushed my spririt and wiped away all the belief I had in God.

2.♡:God is all powerful.

In school,it reached a point where I couldn't function.

I couldn't study,I couldn't do my duties.I couldn't do anything.

I was just... existing.

 

I didn't have any hope of going to university because I was literally doing nothing.

My days consisted of being anxious,feeling depressed,eating, sleeping😂 and engaging in self destructive behaviour,so it was safe to say that I had lost all hope.

This went on until one day I decided to open up about my issues.And I broke down when I did.

I don't take that day as a coincidence,I see it as God seeing His daughter who had lost all hope and decided to remind her that He was in control.Even when she didn't see it,He knew He had a plan for her that was good,pleasing and perfect.And through her life,He knew He would be glorified due to everything He had seen her through.

I would love to say that since that day I became okay and everything was sunshine and rainbows.

But I'd be lying.

I have seen many many dark days since then.

And days when my faith was absolutely nothing.

But at this moment I know that God has ALWAYS been working in the sidelines and He has been routing for me.

He is the only reason I passed my exams and qualified to go to university even when I was in absolutely no shape to sit for that exam.

And He's done so.many.more things after that,so much that not all of it can fit one blog post.

Therefore,He is powerful and He is more than capable of helping you get over whatever life is throwing at you at the moment.

Trust in Him <3.

Phillipians 4:6-7

~Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.~

Joshua 1:9

~Be strong and courageous,do not be frightened & do not be dismayed for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.~

Isaiah 41:13

~For I, the LORD your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, “Fear not, I am the one who helps you.”~

 

John16:33

~I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."~

2 Corinthians 1:3-5

~ Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 5 For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.~